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Hi! We're new dog owners having had our female black lab for the last five months (she's 10 months old now and was spayed). Today, with no advance notice, our neighbor came over with his adult chesapeake bay retriever. Our dog was scared at first (hair on end, barking) but seemed to get used to him somewhat after a few minutes. She was still running away from him mostly but went up to him a few times as well. When his dog started mounting our lab she was clearly trying to get away. I said something and we separated them. My neighbor went on to say it's normal/natural, that his dog hasn't been neutered and that she would probably bite him a bit but that our dog would "get used to it." His dog tried to mount her again and I said I wasn't comfortable with that and we separated them again and they left shortly afterwards. It seemed crazy to me that he would just bring his dog over and expect me to let his dog mount ours like that. Is this normal? Is she safe? I've been watching different dog training channels on youtube and it didn't seem right to me but I don't really know how to even search for a situation like this. Any advice or links to information would be much appreciated. Thanks!
 

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It absolutely is not all right, on any level. Your dog is young and it is perfectly understandable that she isn't comfortable with this, even if she were older she shouldn't have to.put up with that. I don't know what your relationship is like with your neighbour but if he were my neighbour I would be telling him politely but firmly that his dog's behaviour is unacceptable and telling him to keep the dog on lead.

You also would be better stopping it yourself than letting your girl ”bite him a bit” - she shouldn't have to, and it's not a retaliation you would want to encourage.

If it happens again, you could scatter some treats on the ground for him to forage for while you and your girl get away - hopefully they would be enough to distract him, although I suppose that depends on which bodily function he rates as higher ... ?
 

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Thanks, Joanne. I tried to be polite and firm just as you suggested and don't plan to let this happen unless I find any clear indication online that this is within any range of "normal" behavior and the two dogs have a much more developed relationship. But even then, I would want to be very clear that our dog is ok with it and it was very clear today that she wasn't. Otherwise, we generally get along fine with our neighbor but he's definitely more of an old-school kind of person, if that makes any sense. Anyway, I like the treat idea and will keep more on hand in case anything like this happens again.
 

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In my experience, humping other dogs is self-rewarding and can be a form of bullying. So even if not sexual (my neutered male dog would do it with a particular smaller male dog when he got overexcited in play), it is unacceptable, in the same way as any other bullying behaviour.

I was often told that dogs will 'sort it out themselves', both when my dog was being bullied and when he was being a bully himself. But the bully is likely to end up becoming more and more of a bully, and the victims have a good chance of becoming fear aggressive.
 

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Judy and ACM - thank you both for your thoughts and advice. I hadn't really thought of the bullying angle (which it clearly is) and definitely didn't know about the STD thing (wow!). Now I just have to find a way to diplomatically educate my neighbor so that he doesn't try to do it again. I've never locked the gate to our yard but this makes me feel like I should. Our dog is rarely in the backyard without us but I'd HATE to think that she might be attacked when I'm not out there with her or, in some ways worse, if either of my young children were out there with her and the neighbor came over. He's a nice guy in general but he seems to have very old school ideas about how to raise and train dogs. So unfortunate. Anyway, thanks again!
 

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Locking the gate will be a simple solution. Also, it would help prevent your dog getting accidentally lost or even stolen. I also moderate a lost and found pets Facebook page for my community, and many dogs get out simply because someone forgot to fully close the gate.
 

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I agree with SusanLynn all my gates (5) except of the one closest to the house have padlocks on them. It is more of a safety issue so that no one comes through my yard and accidently leaves any gate open. I had horses and we always had combination locks on gates where the field was close to the road. Didn't need them up by the barn.
 

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As mentioned upthread, your neighbor’s dog is being a bully. This behavior is unacceptable and there’s no reason your dog has to put up with it. Lock your gate.
 

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Hi! We're new dog owners having had our female black lab for the last five months (she's 10 months old now and was spayed). Today, with no advance notice, our neighbor came over with his adult chesapeake bay retriever. Our dog was scared at first (hair on end, barking) but seemed to get used to him somewhat after a few minutes. She was still running away from him mostly but went up to him a few times as well. When his dog started mounting our lab she was clearly trying to get away. I said something and we separated them. My neighbor went on to say it's normal/natural, that his dog hasn't been neutered and that she would probably bite him a bit but that our dog would "get used to it." His dog tried to mount her again and I said I wasn't comfortable with that and we separated them again and they left shortly afterwards. It seemed crazy to me that he would just bring his dog over and expect me to let his dog mount ours like that. Is this normal? Is she safe? I've been watching different dog training channels on youtube and it didn't seem right to me but I don't really know how to even search for a situation like this. Any advice or links to information would be much appreciated. Thanks!
This kind of mounting might not be sexual. It could also have to do with dominance. It's hard to tell the difference. I don't find it "normal" and I think your neighbour is being irresponsible by not intervening given that it makes both you and your dog uncomfortable. My advice would be to tell the neighbour that you're not comfortable with his dog doing this and that if he isn't willing to intervene then the dog isn't welcome until such time that he has been neutered.

That's what I would do.
 
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