[baileysmum]

Hi everyone, I am a newby on this site.

I am from the uk and in 2012 I adopted a 16 month old jack russell x from dogs trust. Although we initially had some issues he soon became a family member and we loved him to bits. we are a busy family of 6 but he soon settled into our routine. Sadly last November he suddenly became unwell at the age of 5 and he had cancer. we lost him the end of November 2016. we were devastated and to this day thinking about him makes me cry. Just typing this has set me off and I can hardly see the keys to type.

Anyway, a few weeks ago my neighbour came to see me. a single mum of 4 children, full time job and never had a dog before. they had gotten a pup in November and couldn't cope. he was being left all day and was getting no attention and the kids were terrified of him due to the constant biting. Being a soft touch we agreed to take him in and rehome him. Bailey is a 4 month old cavapoo (more spaniel in him than poodle).

He has been with us 10 days now and I am feeling completely overwhelmed. he can be lovely one minute and just a nightmare the next. I feel like an idiot for feeling like this and a bad person for having negative feelings for this pup who has actually done nothing wrong. He has had no training at all and we are seeing some improvements even in the 10 days but I feel so overwhelmed and then guilty for feeling like this.

Has anyone else felt this way, I feel I am alone in this and am just going day to day and feeling like there is a huge black cloud over my head.

My children are 10, 12, 13 and 15 and I feel like I am getting no help from them. my husband is sitting them down tonight to have a good talk about helping me out but I know they will help a few days then everything will just go back to the way it is now.

 

[baileysmum]

small steps

Well, its been a better afternoon, after sitting and having a cry this morning we both (me and the pup) had a good snooze this afternoon and I woke up in a better frame of mind. I have this afternoon taught him 'sit' I know it sounds daft but it has really lifted my spirits somewhat. Its a small win but the fact he did it, after to be honest not much work and it isnt a fluke as he is still doing it! Maybe its the small things but were was a bit of bonding time, not just omg whats he doing now.

 

[Aspen726]

Hi @baileysmum ! Welcome to DF!

I'm sorry that you're experiencing the puppy blues! We see a lot of posts like yours so you are not alone.

I'm so sorry that you lost your other dog so young Terrible thing.

I love that you taught your new dog to sit! I really enjoy training my dog. I think it is a great way for us to bond but it also makes her a much more enjoyable housemate! I really recommend keeping up with the training.

It's important that puppies aren't bored... that's when they really start to get into trouble!

It would be great if your kids would help you. My 5 year old loves to take care of of our dog. He feeds her everyday and cleans up her toys. I think it's important that they learn to care for a helpless creature.

Hang in there... it will get better

 

[baileysmum]

Thank you Aspen726 for your kind words.

I think if I am honest I am comparing him to my bud (my dog who died) and thats wrong, I shouldn't do this, they are all different characters. We went through hell when we had to have him put to sleep as it was a huge shock with him only being 5 and the way in which he deteriorated so fast.

I am feeling much more positive this afternoon/evening and I am hoping tomorrow will feel a bit brighter than the last few days. I have read a few other posts about the puppy blues and I can see its not just me anymore, I just feel like such a terrible person for feeling this way about a pup.

the main issue with the kids, especially my youngest is the biting, saying that, compared to what he was like the 1st few days there is a vast improvement. I have found when he gets hyper it starts so I am starting the time out method when he gets to much and he generally calms down then. I have had them interacting more with him tonight when they came in from school and I got my 15 year old to walk him instead of me trying to feed 4 kids, keep an eye on him and all the other jobs that needed doing and fit in a teatime walk (my husband works from lunch time till about 9pm so its just me and the kids on a night). it gave me 20 mins to breathe and do a few jobs.

I think it is a case of taking 1 day at a time and continuing with the training

 

[Aspen726]

Also very common to compare dogs... don't be too hard on yourself

When you have some time, you may find these stickies helpful:

http://www.dogforum.com/puppy-help/biting-mouthing-nipping-303634/

http://www.dogforum.com/puppy-help/puppy-blues-125986/

http://www.dogforum.com/puppy-help/reality-puppies-172298/

 

[baileysmum]

Also very common to compare dogs... don't be too hard on yourself

When you have some time, you may find these stickies helpful:

http://www.dogforum.com/puppy-help/biting-mouthing-nipping-303634/

http://www.dogforum.com/puppy-help/puppy-blues-125986/

http://www.dogforum.com/puppy-help/reality-puppies-172298/

Thank you Aspen726, i will make time to read those links, knowledge is power and all that! The 'sit' is still working and has continued today so I am going to try 'lie down' today, wish me luck lol :thumbsup:

 

[Aspen726]

Check out Kikopup on YouTube. She has great training videos

 

[baileysmum]

Check out Kikopup on YouTube. She has great training videos

Thank you, you have been really helpful I will take a look. Today has been a better day. We are building in a stricter routine for him. Play time, nap time, toilet time etc. Getting the kids more involved is going well so far........ its half term next week and I have been promised extra help. he is discovering the stairs so I have put up another safety gate lol, cant having going upstairs quite yet, there will be carnage!

 

[DracoGSD]

My shepherd was an absolute NIGHTMARE from the very beginning, 8 weeks, to 1 year. It climaxed at 1 year when he was becoming very aggressive, then he had a major health issue. His penis was bleeding and oozing because he had a prostate issue. The vet said that it was extremely rare for such a young dog to have this issue but it was caused by nearby females in heat and the constant desire to mate with no release. I had him neutered, and with consistent training, classes and a LOT of fun activities his demeanor completely changed. Not having the hormonal issue really helped, too. The only thing that did not change was his prey drive. He would still kill any chicken or goat he could get his mouth on. He was 3 months old when this started and he killed a chicken. I just learned to accept it and how to manage him around livestock.

A puppy's personality is not forever. It WILL get better!

 

[baileysmum]

My shepherd was an absolute NIGHTMARE from the very beginning, 8 weeks, to 1 year. It climaxed at 1 year when he was becoming very aggressive, then he had a major health issue. His penis was bleeding and oozing because he had a prostate issue. The vet said that it was extremely rare for such a young dog to have this issue but it was caused by nearby females in heat and the constant desire to mate with no release. I had him neutered, and with consistent training, classes and a LOT of fun activities his demeanor completely changed. Not having the hormonal issue really helped, too. The only thing that did not change was his prey drive. He would still kill any chicken or goat he could get his mouth on. He was 3 months old when this started and he killed a chicken. I just learned to accept it and how to manage him around livestock.

A puppy's personality is not forever. It WILL get better!

Hi DracoGSD, so sorry for the delay in replying! I have been off line for a few days. Oh that sounds horrible bless him! That must of been a long 1st year for you!

Since I last posted things are getting better I had a melt down Saturday night and just sat and had a good cry! I felt a bit ridiculous at the time, but afterwards I actually felt a bit better. I came across a fantastic guy on youtube and I have been watching his videos and it really has helped and a lot of what he says makes a lot of sense and has changed my way of thinking. As well as now training him with the sit command I/we have now been working on the lie down command and he is really getting it and doing really well. The biting still continues but not as bad as it was but we are taking steps to try and improve that situation. the worst is when he is a bit hyper and he jumps at your face and snaps which isn't very nice. We are finally getting the toilet situation at a better level. His previous home he was trained to toilet in the back garden as he never got walked. Our back garden is FULL of stones and slate and we spent the 1st 2 weeks pulling our hair out constantly fishing stones and everything else out of his mouth. It wasn't helping with the bonding as we were spending 20/30 minutes out there on a regular basis arguing who's turn it was in the driving wind, rain and some snow. All we were doing was getting frustrated and VERY COLD. Now, he is doing his poo's on walks (which he wouldn't do, we would walk for ages then he would do it in back yard when we got back) and the past few days he has been weeing out on a patch of grass at the back of the house outside of the back yard where there are too many puppy distractions and STONES.

I am feeling much more positive the past 2 days and I am actually starting to like him lol, that sounds a terrible thing to say but the 1st 2 weeks were such hard work as at 4 months he had a lot of bad habits that we are finally starting to see improvements with. Another big win was getting him a kong and the puppy paste to spray inside, it gives me a good hour of more relaxed supervision as he is very focused on his kong, and not being naughty. Those things are worth their weight in gold! :thumbsup: