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My wife and I just got two puppies, about 10 weeks old now. They are lab/Shepard/husky mix. They were the remaining two of four of the litter. They have not been fixed and the vet recommends we wait until 6 months or so.
The girl has been I guess showing her dominance quite a bit lately. She growls at the boy often, for no reason it seems. My wife favors the boy, as he is the "soft and sweet" one. They are both sweet and love to cuddle us and each other. Yet she seems to want to growl and fight the boy, even when they are both in their gated section of the house at night and we are upstairs. We separate them when they eat, when they play when we get home they are fine, but later in the night she starts. I m sure she does it when we aren t home.
They both seem to favor my wife more than me. Could it be just them establishing a pecking order?
I should add, the girl gets more angry and growls more when we try to separate them. I push her back or hold her neck hair on the back of her neck and she bucks at him, mich like on a movie where two guys are fighting and the guy is saying "hold me back!"
What can we do?
 

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It's not good that they're already not getting along. You need to get a handle on this asap, especially with them being litter mates(there can sometimes be behavioral problems associated with keeping two litter mates).
I can tell you it's not dominance and you being forceful with her when she tells him off isn't going to help. If anything that will make her associate him with bad things happening to her, i.e. you punishing her.
What are they doing when she growls? Are they just walking around? Does it happen around toys or during other play? Does she growl when they're both near you or your wife? etc. More info is probably needed here. It can't just be for no reason.
 

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I should add, the girl gets more angry and growls more when we try to separate them. I push her back or hold her neck hair on the back of her neck and she bucks at him, mich like on a movie where two guys are fighting and the guy is saying "hold me back!"
What can we do?
You can and need to stop doing this. This is making her angrier and feeling as though she needs to fight back. This could also create more animosity towards her brother, and you and her wife. If she believes that being held/touched by a person is a bad thing, that can be dangerous and doesn't make for a good pet. Personally I also think your wife coddling the male is making her want to push back more. It's not the same situation as you got them at the same time but often when there is a new dog coming into a home with another dog, the first one there will "push around" or growl at the other one, often to establish a bit of a pecking order. The "weaker" dog being loved on more makes the other one feel she has to prove herself more. Sometimes it can be possessiveness over the person too. But even with dogs who have a "pecking order" so to speak, all of that alpha dog stuff is garbage. Often one will be "on top" sometimes and the other will other times, even if it's not equally.

It DOES sound like your female puppy is a bit of a bully personality. You need to train the two of them (separately) ASAP. I would suggest hiring a trainer to train both of them separately with you because it would probably be more cost effective than 2 puppy classes. I would also NOT leave them in the same room together when you're not home in case a fight breaks out and someone gets hurt. I recommend crate training.

Also, I'm not saying you definitely should return one of the puppies (I'm guessing you'd choose the female), but there are A LOT of problems that can arise when adopting two puppies. Honestly it already sounds like it's started. You should read up a little on littermate syndrome, and like I said seek out a trainer. Make sure it's a positive reinforcement trainer, no shock, choke or prong collars--the exacerbate behavior problems. After a trainer evaluation, then you will know where to go. You just need to nip these problems in the bud before the dogs get more difficult to manage.

https://blog.betternaturedogtraining.com/2013/07/18/littermate-syndrome/

Don’t Take Two Littermates | The Bark
 

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I agree with @traciek88

You should absolutely read this article and consider your options.

Adopting Littermates… (Don’t)

The rescue or breeder you got them from should have informed you, as a reputable informed one would advise against it.

If you do decide to keep both of them and see if it can work out, you will need to spend a lot of time training them individually and doing things individually. It is a lot of work though, more than most people can take on.
 

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make sure to do as much as possible with the dogs separated.
training, walking, playing, socialising...spend as much time with the dogs individual and separate them.
perhaps you and your wife could part the duty, she doing the education of the male dog while you take the little fighter with you for education.

fighting behaviour should not be enforced, so it's best to separate them before the fight starts and for this you need to know the body laguage of your dog well.
if they can't get alone keep them separate and then slowly introduce them again in a controlled surrounding.
 
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