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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
---Detailed Version: (Scroll to bottom for summarized version of the post)---

I have a couple of questions and need advice. I will preface my post with a few details. My husband and I live with his grandparents and their 6 year old Maltese they have had since he was a puppy. We have lived with them and their dog for over 3 years now. We have our own room/apartment type thing within the home. We are very close to his grandparents and Boudreaux (the Maltese), we spend time with them in the common areas of the home then go back to our area, but Boudreaux often has spent time with us in our room. We just got a new dog 1 week ago. Her name is Bayleigh, she is a little over 3 years old, a Papillon mix. We are pretty confident that she is mixed is Daschund.

Her dog bed, food & water bowls, toys, and kennel are all in our room because she is our dog and lives with us in our area of the house. She has known from day 1 that she is our dog and she's very comfortable in our/her part of the house, though she does spend time in the common areas with my grandmother-in-law sometimes when we aren't there. And she follows us around everywhere around the house. In just a week she has gotten very comfortable here. She has more structure here than her previous home where she lived with 3 other dogs. She came to us house trained, but we have had to train her in other ways such as sleeping in her own bed, etc.

Now to the questions. As I stated she has become comfortable and confident around all of us, even Boudreaux. Except for my grandfather-in-law (we call him Poppy). Poppy is very big and tall, has a deep voice and I can see why he would be intimidating to her. But his energy is not threatening at all, as he is a complete softy, especially when it comes to animals and children. When Bae first got home, he tried petting her and she snapped at him. Anytime he was around she would rin away. We instructed him to keep his distance, to wait for her to come up to him, and if he did get close to her, to approach her slowly. He followed our instructions, and she seems to be getting less afraid of him. But she is still very leery of him, yet she is comfortable around everyone else. How can we get her to trust him?

Second question. Bae and Boudreaux have gotten along pretty well so far, as long as he doesn't try to come in our room. If he tries to come in our room she will bark at him and chase him away. We don't want this. Boudreaux has always been welcome in our room, and we want him to continue to feel safe entering it. We want Bae and Boudreaux to be companions, to fully trust one another, and to welcome each other into the other one's turf. How can we initiate healthy interactions between them? Bae is also unsure about playing with Boudreaux. When we've had them playing together, or we're showing affection, one will get jealous. How do we create a balanced interaction with the both of them, and help them not feel possessive of us?

Next question. Whenever Bayleigh is in our room with us, and we're just chilling watching TV or doing whatever, if one of the grandparents walks past our bedroom door, she will stare intently, growl, and bark at whoever it is. We have started opening the door and showing her that it is just a family member, she will stop alerting then, but next time she will alert again. How do we keep her from being territorial over our room? We want everyone to come and go as they please, and for Bayleigh to be cool with it.

I know it has only been a week and we are asking a lot. But I would just like some advice on how to proceed. How can we make this house and family comfortable and safe for all? Apologies for the length, any advice will be greatly appreciated! If any further information is needed, feel free to ask! ;)

---EDIT: Summarized Version---
My new dog Bayleigh has lived with us for a week. She gets along well with everyone, but is still unsure about my GFiL and Resident dog Boudreaux (6 year old Maltese). Suggestions needed on how to acclimate the two dogs!! Any advice would help so much!! Today Bayleigh got agitated with Boudreaux again, she barked and chased him away from her, while we were all standing in our kitchen. Please help if anyone knows how to properly acquaint the two doggies.
 

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I think time is the key. You are right to tell your Grandfather in law to not rush her, in fact the best advice is to ignore her, completely, not even make eye contact (which dogs find intimidating). He should also try to avoid getting between her and anywhere she considers her safe place -her bed for example, so she doesn't have to pass him. If he passes her, he could start dropping (not tossing) something lovely like roast chicken pieces. Or he could put them on the floor a door or so away from his feet (Boudreaux shouldn't be around, you dont want to create a flashpoint over this). Her body language will be interesting - if she runs in, gets the treat then runs away, she isn't ready for this and your GFiL should go back to dropping the treat and walking on. When she starts to eat the treat near him, her confidence is growing. He could then place the treat by his foot and once she is ok with that, let her take it from his hand - still no eye contact and keep his shoulders facing slightly away from her.

When he does touch her, use the 5 second rule - pet her for 5 seconds then stop. If she initiates further contact by nudging or similar, pet for another 5 seconds then stop again. Only continue for as long as she asks. This builds her confidence by giving her control over the amount of touch she gets, as she can stop it at any time.

I will let someone else answer about the relationship between the two dogs as I don't have much experience in that area. But are you walking them together? And maybe the territorial behaviour around the room is because she knows someone is there but doesn't know who; maybe a baby gate would help?
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Thank you for your timely response and all of the very useful advice! I really like the idea of my GFiL strategically offering her treats, I hadn't even considered that. All of your suggestions will be instrumental in this process. I have read your comment to the grandparents, they are on board with this plan! I will update the thread on our progress. Thanks again for taking the time to leave a reply. 😁 Enjoy the rest of your day!
 
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