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My partner does not discipline the dog, so when the dog is with both of us she blatantly ignores me and tries to go to him because she knows she is never punished by him.

When it's just her and I 90% of the time shes a perfect dog, as soon as he enters the room she completely disregards me or any commands I give her. She's often so excited to see him that she jumps up and becomes rowdy, it's always an obnoxious scene.

I'm glad the dog likes him but I need her to listen to me and pay attention to me. Since he's always the "fun" one she doesn't even really play with me (with or without him around). I'm lost.

Any suggestions?
 

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Ooooh, this one's easy, seriously, and you will get many suggestions here. You get to be the fun one. It's the other way around in my house, because I carry the best treats, while my husband trains with dog food. Now my dog behaves for either one of us, but given a choice, he will come to me.
Look up the training stickies in the forums, how to train a dog, and you'll see how to do it.
Start with figuring out what your dog loves that you can provide, or control. Food is an obvious choice. Which foods that can be kept in a pocket and cut up in pea sized bits is what you need.
Favourite toys? Games? Another ace in the hole.
Back scratches? Ear rubs, yep.
That's the start.
Youtube is your friend, look up kikopup.
 
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I don't discipline the dogs, but I am the one who reinforces the rules. It doesn't stop the dogs from wanting to be with me. Shorty goes to my BF more, but Freyja and Vegas are 'my' dogs. Freyja especially follows me everywhere, she'll take toys from others and bring them to me. I'm going to assume you follow more of the dominance/alpha theory training. Stop.

http://www.dogforum.com/training-behavior-stickies/dominance-dogs-4076/

Play with your dog, do training, train tricks. And remember that you can love your dog, but they do not think like people do.
 
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stop punishing and start reward good behaviour.
If your attention and presence is more rewarding and interesting for your dog than that of your partner, it will stick with you. :)

You can not only reward with food, you can also reward with activities.
generally spend time doing stuff with your dog that he likes.
Many dogs love playing or working with their owners, so when you do with them what they love (like safely searching and watching wild animals with a prey driven dog, playing tugging games, doing agility games, nose work, chasing games, tricks...) they will associate this fun with you and you're more interesting for them. :D
 

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I recommend finding some fun, positive based training protocols to get her confidence in you up. My dog is a rescue from the animal shelter who I adopted with a lot of issues. She's doing awesome now! I use positive training, especially clicker training with her.
 

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Be alot easier in the long run if you sit down and speak with your partner, become a team. You can be a team, balance the dog and still love the dog.
 

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I have four dogs in our household (with three people), and amongst the three, I am by far the strictest disciplinarian. However, all four dogs prefer my attention and affection. In fact, it's quite similar to what you describe in your household... when I'm not around, the dogs do fine with the others in the house. As soon as I enter the picture, they pretty much ignore the others in large stretches of time and only respond to me.

If you never reward the dog, then yes, take some of the advice above and reward your dog, but only for obvious things and not overdo it. Otherwise the dog will see you as nothing more than a treat dispensing machine, and you don't want that.

Also, by now, it's pretty obvious that your dog has bonded with your partner. She still loves you, but as a result, you will probably never elevate to the same status as your partner. However, below are some things that I recommend to at least elevate yourself in her eyes:

(None of what's below is to indicate that I know how you treat or behave with your dog, as I don't know. So I am not being judgmental or critiquing what I don't know about. This is merely how I treat my dogs vs what is lacking from the others in my own household by others)

1) Be playful with your puppy. Actually take some time and have one on one time, with or without your partner around. Use toys some times. Don't use them at other times. Use a toy or rope to play tug of war, and let your dog win after an appropriate amount of time (and obviously before the puppy gives up).

2) Show respect to the dog. Give her her own space, allow her to be by herself. Don't insist on her being next to you at all times.

3) If you have to discipline her, use an authoritative voice and not a mean spirited one. Never yell at her unless it is absolutely necessary (usually when you are trying to avert a dangerous situation). If you ever do have to yell at her (again, a VERY rare instance), immediately tone it down to a non-yelling authoritative voice.

4) Be respectful and fair, even when disciplining, and don't discipline when a simple redirect is really all that's warranted. For instance, don't yell at or discipline your dog just because it sticks it nose up toward the counter when it smells a new food item or treat bag you just opened. This is a moment when a simple (and gentle) redirect will suffice and perhaps a simple "No" will do.

5) Never hit your dog, even when disciplining her. Don't discipline if the dog goes to the bathroom in the house.

6) When she enters the room with you in it, or you enter a room with her already enter it, show genuine enthusiasm that you are happy that you two are together. Talk to the dog in a "happy voice". Give it a pet or rub where she likes it (neck, head, belly, etc...) Don't try to fake it. Many humans can pick up on fake enthusiasm, and dogs are even better at reading our emotions.

Hope this helps.
 

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Talk to your partner! Raising a dog is like raising a child - you both have to be on the same page! Besides how it could negatively affect your dog, think about how it's also going to have a negative impact on your relationship, if you always feel like the discipline is left up to you, as time goes by that may very well turn into resentment.

It's important that you both agree on how to treat and discipline your dog, otherwise it's not going to be a good situation for any of you!
 

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Talk to your partner! Raising a dog is like raising a child - you both have to be on the same page! Besides how it could negatively affect your dog, think about how it's also going to have a negative impact on your relationship, if you always feel like the discipline is left up to you, as time goes by that may very well turn into resentment.

It's important that you both agree on how to treat and discipline your dog, otherwise it's not going to be a good situation for any of you!
This is also great advice, and if you talk to your partner, this should be what is covered. Well said, Kemosabe. Even though I can't take credit for this, I'd recommend adding it to what I said earlier. Your partner also needs to be involved with the discipline.
 
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