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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
A few weeks ago I posted about my dog Harley and his battle with congestive heart failure.

Yesterday he was breathing short and shallow, but was eating and being himself. I went to the dentist, had the intention of going to work after, but my gut told me to go home. I got home at 9:30am and decided to give him extra meds to help his breathing.

He was tired and eventually the breathing was labored enough that I knew it was time. I talked to him for a long time and told him it was ok to go and that we would help him. I called my husband and we set an appointment at the vet so they could assist Harley with his journey.

By the time we got there, he was really struggling, so they gave him a dose of morphine to take the edge off. They took him in the back to put the line in his leg, and when they brought him back, his heart was already irregular and he was on his way out. So the dr quickly assisted him as my husband and I hugged him and told him how loved he is. I put my head on his chest and listened to his heart stop. I'm happy I got to hear the last beat and hold him afterward.

We worked so hard to keep him happy and healthy. He had a cardiologist, a case of pills he took each day, home cooked meals, and so many belly rubs. We carried him up and down the stairs so he wouldn't get winded. We did everything we could. I just hope we did enough.

I miss him. My heart feels like it has been ripped from my chest and I keep thinking I'm wrong and he's actually not gone. I asked the doctor several times if she was sure that he was actually dead because it doesn't seem real.

The house is quiet now. He used to snore as he slept, like a little old man. I stayed up all night because I couldn't hear him snoring.

I don't know how people get through this type of pain. I've lost family member before, but this is raw and ugly. I'm dried out from crying. When I cry, there are no tears now. Just gut wrenching pain and a feeling of helplessness.

Sorrry for the ugly side of grief. I just don't know who else would understand what I'm going through, other than you all.
 

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I'm so sorry. You did everything you could and I know that your dog knew that until the very end. :huddle:

It's so hard losing a beloved pet.

Is that him in your avatar picture? What a sweet picture.
 

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I'm so sorry for your loss, I teared up reading your post.

Sending good thoughts your way
 

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oh man I'm in tears...I am so sorry for your loss. You and your husband did everything you could and I'm sure he knew that. I can tell through your post how much you loved and cared for him. Sending you a virtual *hug*
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Thank you all for your kind words. I know each of you understand the weight of this grief. This is the first dog I've ever lost, and my love for him can't be measured. He is so good and pure. I know he was happy and had a great life, but that doesn't make this easier. I miss him so much.
 

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I'm so sorry for your loss!

Yes I know that type of pain all to well. I've lost two dogs, the first completely unexpectedly, and the other from extreme old age. The first hurt the worse because it was way to sudden and completely unexpected, and I expect that's what you are going through now with the loss of Harley. Please know that it does get easier to bear, the pain eases, and you'll be able to focus on the good memories with a smile and laugh rather then tears. Give yourself as much time as you need to mourn his loss, and please know that we are here if you need a shoulder to cry on or to share memories.
 

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Loss of a family member, pretty sure we've all been there. Sounds like your pup had a wonderful life, and you can rest easy that you kept him going to the end.

Sorry to hear. They say time heals all wounds, some dogs i've never gotten over.
 

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I am so sorry you are hurting but can you at least be kind to yourself ?.... Knowing you gave him the best of the best in caring and loving him. Right now there is a big ugly hole in your heart, and you feel that nothing will heal it..........but your sweet Harley left that hole so he could leave room for the next guy, because he would like you to smile again..........someday.
 

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Dogs In Heaven?
An old man and his dog were walking down this dirt road with fences on both sides, they came to a gate in the fence and looked in, it was nice grassy, woody areas, just what a 'huntin' dog and man would like, but, it had a sign saying 'no trespassing' so they walked on. They came to a beautiful gate with a person in white robes standing there. "Welcome to Heaven" he said. The old man was happy and started in with his dog following him. The gatekeeper stopped him. "Dogs aren't allowed, I'm sorry but he can't come with you."

"What kind of Heaven won't allow dogs? If he can't come in, then I will stay out with him. He's been my faithful companion all his life, I can't desert him now."

"Suit yourself, but I have to warn you, the Devil's on this road and he'll try to sweet talk you into his area, he'll promise you anything, but the dog can't go there either. If you won't leave the dog, you'll spend Eternity on this road."

So the old man and dog went on. They came to a rundown fence with a gap in it, no gate, just a hole. Another old man was inside. "S'cuse me Sir, my dog and I are getting mighty tired, mind if we come in and sit in the shade for awhile?"

"Of course, there's some cold water under that tree over there. Make yourselves comfortable"

"You're sure my dog can come in? The man down the road said dogs weren't allowed anywhere."

"Would you come in if you had to leave the dog?"

"No sir, that's why I didn't go to Heaven, he said the dog couldn't come in.
We'll be spending Eternity on this road, and a glass of cold water and some shade would be mighty fine right about now. But, I won't come in if my buddy here can't come too, and that's final."

The man smiled a big smile and said "Welcome to Heaven."

"You mean this is Heaven? Dogs ARE allowed? How come that fellow down the road said they weren't?"

"That was the Devil and he gets all the people who are willing to give up a life long companion for a comfortable place to stay. They soon find out their mistake, but then it's too late. The dogs come here, the fickle people stay there. GOD wouldn't allow dogs to be banned from Heaven. After all, HE created them to be man's companions in life, why would he separate them in death?"
(Based on the "Twilight Zone" episode "The Hunt" written by Earl Hamner Jr.)
petloss.com
 

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Sorry about your loss. Our dogs become apart of our family and when it's their time to go it's very hard to deal with. It's nice to know your dog was so loved. That dog must've been so happy to have you. Time will heal your wounds of this but we never forget our dogs. They bring so much joy to our lives.
 
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