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Alright so I realize I'm not going to get anywhere with Strider unless my parents and brother are on the same page as I am.
My ex roommate and I are very big with dogs but she knew breeds a lot better then I did. Her favorite being the Whippet, mine Boxers. Very often she'd talk to me about training and forward a couple books, and bought me a guide to boxers since I expected my next dog would be one. We also watched "It's me or the dog" often in the background while we worked. Princess (Schnauzer/Chihuahua) wasn't naturally aggressive to the family and was very attached to my mother so I figured when I moved out I'd get a boxer. Regardless, I know the power of positive reward training.
My dad how ever watches "The Dog Whisperer" so he thinks Cesar's methods are king. Dad just likes the idea of EVERYONE trembling before him.
Course with Princess' unexpected early passing, and my parents wanting me to come home (cuz I fled the state for a week); I ended up with handsome german shepherd mix Strider. My bf isn't thrilled because he feels getting another dog was my parents "Quick fix" to condition me.

So, if you've read my post in dog behavior, you'll know that I'm having a little trouble with Strider not liking anyone but me. I understand I need to do counter conditioning and going to research more but my parents are being very intrusive, yelling and getting into his personal space. I feel bad because he seeks my protection but my parents order me not to. Any ideas to change my parents minds of their approach?
 

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Parents are hard ;)

I'd sit them down (call a family meeting). Let them know that this is VERY important to you, and what you expect them to do. Let them know your not asking, your imploring begging and cajoling. Let them know that what they are currently doing is upsetting you.

Don't get angry or argumentative. Be calm and reasonable but assertive-don't back down-this is important to you and it's a simple request :)
 

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Thank you :3 Thankfully when I got home from work, dad was in a better mood. Apparently he had a good day with the dog. So I told him a little about the difference between Victoria and Cesar based on what I heard from my friend and from the forum thread on this site. Apparently he never heard about Victoria. I also told him about clicker training. Got my Dad thinking.

After today seems we might be getting to the root of the problem which I'll update my other thread about. Dad I think can accept people and things that truly care about me.
 

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i really really really recommend you get that book i suggested by patricia mcconnell. "the cautious canine" seriously, it explains all sorts about this type of training and she speaks to the reader/dog owner in a very sympathetic way. it may help you in your mission to convince your parents of this. she also wrote "the other end of the leash" and a few others that i would recommend. for some reason people, in general, feel that they need to dominate dogs...this is a common belief, i hear it all the time, so try not to be too hard on your dad (mine's like that too:))
i actually just managed to convince a friend of mine to do this with her dog (he very nearly bit a friend at my house) by actually showing her that it worked.....maybe if you get one person in your family on your "side" you can use them to help you show that this really does work....
good luck!



Dog | Forum | Rocks!
 

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I once heard that all parents suffer from "powdered butt syndrome." Whether you have proof or not they will never listen to you if they ever powdered your butt. Most people are open to suggestions if they think the original idea is their own. Study a little Psychology, it will be your best friend when it comes to understanding and dealing with people, even your parents. Its also fun to see the looks you get when you tell them that part of your college education was in Psychology. They literally look at you like you can read their minds, lol.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
i really really really recommend you get that book i suggested by patricia mcconnell. "the cautious canine" seriously, it explains all sorts about this type of training and she speaks to the reader/dog owner in a very sympathetic way. it may help you in your mission to convince your parents of this. she also wrote "the other end of the leash" and a few others that i would recommend. for some reason people, in general, feel that they need to dominate dogs...this is a common belief, i hear it all the time, so try not to be too hard on your dad (mine's like that too:))
i actually just managed to convince a friend of mine to do this with her dog (he very nearly bit a friend at my house) by actually showing her that it worked.....maybe if you get one person in your family on your "side" you can use them to help you show that this really does work....
good luck!
Oh crap, My ex roommate has "the other side of the leash". When I was still living with her, she placed it on my computer to read but never got around to it. I wonder if she let me borrow it. X3 I put Cautious Canine on my amazon wish list. My gift card is like short of a few cents with out shipping fee so I'm-ma wait a little since I have to make a couple trips to the city this week. (woo, 31 bucks out of my pocket... this person calling me out hopefully will make it worth it..)
Hopefully I can get my dad to see Victoria at least in action... My ex roomie and I are going to a dog show/convention actually in October. If they allow video, that would be perfect to show him.

Scent, I know what you mean. I had a hard time asserting myself and expressing my feelings with out getting shut down. They have this rule that even if they are wrong to not correct them and abide to their decision simply because they created me. So I avoid talking to them whenever possible and simply do my thing without asking. It's like the best way to not get in trouble.
 

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Well I am finding this interesting thread. The reasoning is that when I started in Shepherds and got involved other than obedience or Conformation- ie into Sch. or k9 work etc- my parents thought I was "nuts", and possibly " putting myself in danger" type deal. Until they came to my first trail. Then they were Hooked! They could see the control it took to do these sports, and although totally different than how you would train like one of their spaniels, they could see the results of this.
Sometimes the proof is just in the pudding. Until that first showing it was more like " well this is what I am trying to accomplish and their agreement to let it run its course and really operating on blind faith of " well she must know what she is doing- I don't see it but at least its consistant.'
That is the subject I wante to mention- one of the biggest things of training is consistancy. So maybe when you have your talk, you could focus more on that main point of training ( ie " we have to be consistant for this to work, so could we try it my way here and see how it unfolds".. Etc. If nothing else parents do understand consistancy- and maybe if you try that angle in this conversation ( or conversations..) that would be a good approach. Also another thing to keep in mind- dog training is a positive activity and while you are not a child, you are their child- so surely they can see this as a positive activity you are working on.
Good luck.
 

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Good luck! My Mom is open to my training ideas and is really trying to do what I ask of her and to be consistent because she understands it's my dog and wants to help. My Dad on the other hand thinks he knows everything and that "the crazy Internet people" don't know what they're talking about. He also has seen Cesar Millan and thinks his methods must work because he's on TV.

Don't me started...
 
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