I'm not really looking for advice. Mostly venting. I know what I need to do. Let me give some background. I was on this board three years ago when I first got Joey. He's a papillon, but strangely has anxiety and aggression issues which make him a little hard to handle in public. I used to dream of taking him everywhere with me, and if there weren't any other dogs (or people, especially running children) around that might have worked.
My mother in law is a bit of a crazy dog lady. She has multiple dogs at any given time. She had an American Eskimo, who she decided she didn't want anymore. We took her in as a companion to Joey. We named her Lucy. She's a sweet dog, very submissive, which works with Joe's dominant personality. They get along fine and I never had problems between them.
Mother in law also has a Chow Chow and a Husky (among others). The husky wound up pregnant and had 8 Chowskies.
My husband really wanted one of the pups. I didn't. I'm not a fan of the Chows because the one's I'd known were always aggressive. I knew I'd end up losing that battle so I told him if he brings one home, bring a female. I don't need the drama between males.
At first she tried to sell the other pups, but no one wanted to pay what she wanted. Only one actually got sold. Eventually she got attached and decided to try to keep them all. She tripped and fell down the basement steps and my father in law decided to step in. He took 3 of the pups away from her.
He sent one to my sister in law. He sent us two (in addition to the one we adopted), and the idea was to give them away. One went quickly. He was the most aggressive and I was glad to see him go. The other was very timid and shy, but seemed ok otherwise. We never found a home for him. Eventually we named him Bear. As Bear got older, the tension grew between him and Joe. This dog got quite large and he's not even a year old yet.
I've been very nervous watching these dogs interact and kept telling my husband I'm worried he's going to kill Joey one day. They've gotten into fights and Joey won't back down to him. Problem is he's 5 times Joey's size.
Then there was the territory battles. He would go into Joey's crate and pee directly on his bed. We couldn't leave them upstairs with us for long periods of time and when we did, we had to keep our eye on them constantly or they'd pee. We spend most of our time in the basement as a result. Otherwise they'd be alone a lot. They couldn't be trusted upstairs.
I've been wanting to get rid of him, as was the original plan, but my kids were attached. So was my husband. I tried to like him, and I did, except for this male dominance drama I never wanted.
One of the main points of contention between the boys was food. They had to be fed separately. Unfortunately, this is where it went downhill. A bowl was left out. There didn't seem to be a problem, Joe would hang back when Bear was eating, so I made the mistake of letting it be. I'd hoped maybe Joey accepted his new role in relationship to bear. Until yesterday. Joe was eating and Bear muscled his way in. Joe didn't fight, but stood real close and stared him down.
Bear snapped and attacked him. He had him by the neck and nothing I did would get him to even notice I was there. He was so focused on him it was scary. It took a long time before he let go and there was blood all over his fur. Joe was shaken, but mostly ok. I didn't see any major wounds on him, but he could have killed him!
After the fight, I ran a bath and Joe jumped right in. He hasn't been that willing to take a bath in a very long time. He was probably happy to get all the chowsky slobber off him. I examined him and don't see any deep wounds. The bleeding stopped quickly.
This morning as I was letting them out, they clearly still have beef. Joe still won't back down to him. Fortunately our yard has two fenced in areas so it's easy to keep them separated.
I told my husband I'm done. This big dog has to go. Joe might be a bit of a jerk himself, but he was here first and I didn't want a male chowsky in the first place.
He offered the dog to his sister and if she doesn't take him, we're taking him back to his mom's house. Hopefully today. I want to relax and enjoy my other dogs.
As I'm typing this, the chowskies are outside. Joe and Lucy are hanging out with me. Upstairs in the living room. It's quiet. Except for Joe snoring. There's no drama. It's how it should be.
Kimba, the female Chowsky, gets to stay. For now. She's mostly pretty good except for her puppy tendency to get into everything. My daughter has a friend over who she's reluctant to warm up to. Not sure what that's all about, but she keeps barking at her. I just put her back outside for now. Maybe we'll try again later.