Anxiety after getting a puppy for the first time.

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Anxiety after getting a puppy for the first time.

This is a discussion on Anxiety after getting a puppy for the first time. within the Puppy Help forums, part of the Dog Training and Behavior category; Hi, Only a couple of days ago, I got my first ever french bulldog puppy. Problem is not in the puppy, but in me. I'm ...

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Old 06-28-2013, 12:54 PM
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Anxiety after getting a puppy for the first time.

Hi,

Only a couple of days ago, I got my first ever french bulldog puppy. Problem is not in the puppy, but in me. I'm really terrified that something bad might happen to him, that I might lack the experience to care for him, or the responsibility of caring for him might consume my daily activities and my "personal" time. I know that we humans are victims of our routine, and we stress a lot when there's a huge change in the balance of daily routine and other activities. Still, knowing and saying it is one thing, but actually going with the different flow is something entirely different.

I know that the puppy will grow older in time, and he will adjust (with my help) to be more independent without me, and he'll allow me to have some free time for myself, without hogging every last waking minute for himself, like it is now. I can't even go to the restroom to take a crap, without him barking and yodeling.

I also have a cat. 6yr old russian blue. I'm really terrified that they will never get along, and will be constantly fighting. So far the dog isn't noticing her that much, but the cat is scared, angry, hissing and posturing as soon as she sees him. Though in the last couple days the progress has slowly been increasing. The cat is observing the dog a little bit closer and closer. She understands now, that her space hasn't been invaded and she's still the master of the household. I really love her, and she loves me back. I've had quite a few cats in my life, but she's the golden one, that only comes once in a lifetime. It would tear me apart inside if something happened to her.

Anxiety is slowly consuming me, to the point that I can barely eat, or concentrate on something else, let alone be in a good mood. I'm struggling at times to contain tears in my eye sockets, but I get these short outbursts that I restrain in a couple moments. That's coming from a 21yr old guy... I guess I'm just more emotionally sensitive than others.

I really hope that it will all pass, and I'll be able to put my life back together as it was. I'll be studying at a university this Fall, so I still have time until then to potty/house train him. I hope that I will put my nerves into a can and grow over my anxiety.

Last edited by ShoehornNinja; 06-28-2013 at 01:04 PM.
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Old 08-23-2013, 02:56 PM
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I know how you feel. This was exactly how I felt the day before I got my puppy.

Just recently I left on a vacation for 1 week and let my family friends', who also own a dog, to care for my pup. Over there at their place they had three people and a dog to accompany mine and a full house to run around in. At my house, it's much larger and has a lot of carpet, and she's not very potty trained so we don't let her roam around the entire house, but we do keep her in fairly big area. My mom works 5 days a week for 8 hours during the day and my dad works 7 days a week, over 8 hours, my brother could careless about the dog and I also have school and require personal time. Ever since I got back, I had worried that maybe she liked being in the care of them over my family and I don't really know what to do about it. I thought about getting a second dog, but know my parents would not approve.
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Old 08-24-2013, 09:55 AM
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You will be fine, and so will your cutie pie puppy. This is a totally normal reaction, but let me tell you, making time for yourself is SO important. I would start crate training right away- and make sure you have some earplugs. Frenchies are notorious for making the WORST noises. I think that is why so many of them scream- they get what they want so that they shut up. Haha.
Since he is so little, and not really noticing the cat, just let her figure stuff out on her own, but make sure she has a part of the house that he cannot access, and that she can make it to her litter box and food without having to pass the dog. It will keep her stress levels down.
Sometimes, even now I just have to leave the dogs to remember how to be a person. I walk them, toss a frozen kong on each bed and dart out of the house as fast as I can. You can give your little guy a kong or something else yummy in his crate when you need some space. No one, especially not the dog will judge you for that.
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Old 08-24-2013, 03:32 PM
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Moose was my first puppy ever, before her we always adopted older dogs. I can't tell you how many times google has helped (ie, I didn't know puppies lost teeth, I also didn't know you could give them benadryl if they had an allergic reaction, ect) so there's always google to turn to if you feel you don't know something!

As for the cat thing it takes some time. When we first brought home Moose she tormented the cats. We have one non-reactive cat (she is a ragdoll mix and is very ragdoll in the sense you can do anything to her and she wont respond) and a big maine coon who really helped in putting the dog in their place. You'll be surprised how well a cat can defend themselves and frenchies aren't that big. If my maine coon can put a pit bull in her place your Russian will have no problem showing him who's boss. They wont get along at first, it's just nature, and sometimes they just wont be best friends but they will learn to tolerate each other. Moose is a little over three now and they tolerate each other. They don't cuddle with one another like some dogs and cats do (sometimes they'll sleep on separate areas of the same bed but that's about it) and they still squabble (read: Steve (the maine coon) picks on the dog) but it's all about giving them time to adjust to one another.
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Old 08-24-2013, 09:15 PM
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I felt the same way too until i found this forum. I was so scared that i was doing things wrong for our puppy. If it was not for the people here telling me that they went through the same thing at puppyhood, i would have gone bonkers with anxiety and guilt.
Crate training is a good start, Chelsea was right on that. It will take sometime for your puppy to get use to it, but make him feel that the crate is the provider of the greatest things ever. Treats when he goes in by himself, toys inside, meals inside. Users here suggested games in the crate for the puppy and i tried them and our puppy now is getting used to her crate and now has learned that when she goes out without me calling her after i close the door and open it again, she won't get a treat.
You are not alone in this. It will pay off...good early training and consistency is the key.
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Old 08-26-2013, 01:14 PM
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I found this website to be helpful...im trying to combat that too...
www.puppydepression.com
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Old 08-26-2013, 01:30 PM
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This is totally normal. It happens to new parents, too.

Look, dogs survive living on the streets. They survive being stuck in the back yard on chain. They survive puppy mills. If they can survive that, I think your dog will be fine in his loving home.

Will you make mistakes? Sure, we all do! It's okay. But I already know you'll be a great owner, because bad owners don't worry at all, because they don't care. People who care torment themselves with worry. You'll be fine and so will your dog.
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Old 08-26-2013, 01:52 PM
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Oh my gosh!!! That puppy is for freakin cute!!!! :d
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Old 08-26-2013, 02:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blujazz25 View Post
I found this website to be helpful...im trying to combat that too...
www.puppydepression.com
That website is amazing! I mean, I knew from having post-partum blues after my son was born 26 years ago that this was similar, but they have it really nailed, spot on.

The most ironic thing to me is that I got Cobber because I was bored and lonely and felt like I had no life at all and nothing to fill my time with. Almost as soon as I got him home, I felt that I would never have a second of time to myself again, and suddenly all that time being bored seemed really really good and I wanted it back. Thankfully, he really is progressing quickly and I'm no longer depressed about my choice to get him.

Anyway, that is a very informative and reassuring website!
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Old 08-27-2013, 04:23 PM
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Like all others on this stream who have experienced new puppy woes, YOU WILL GET THROUGH IT!! Oh my pup broke me down on several occasions. I tortured myself with doubts and felt utterly helpless and with no clue as to what i should do about my new pup. I had a cat that hated her and she was just so excited and playful about my cat i thought he would never come around.

You will learn so much about yourself through dealing with you pup. And once you get into the training of manners and fun tricks you will become fascinated with the psychology behind it. At least i sure did! Its a lesson in patience and a total blast at the same time. I have suggested this person before and I will pass along the info again: Dr. Ian Dunbars SIRIUS puppy training video. It freaking saved my life - no joke. Tons of practical and useful information for new puppy owners.

I have never owned a dog before in my life, not even a family pet as a child so i was majorly over my head when I got my pup. But the more you work with yours the more joy will eventually creep into each day and each session spent together. As Amaryllis said earlier: the very fact that you are on Dog Forum says you care and you are in it to win it with your pup. Great Job! Welcome to the Forum, it has been my savior for all questions, depressions, fears and funnies. Congrats on your new family member!!
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Last edited by ninjitsuja; 08-27-2013 at 04:26 PM.
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